WELCOME TO MY CRAZY BLOG!

I'm nuts, no question. There will be ranting, some profanity.. feel free to join in, but be nice.. ish! This blog keeps me from lying in the fetal position in the closet clutching a stuffed unicorn... or something. Welcome, I apologize in advance, enjoy the ride!

Friday, January 06, 2012

Old people dust

Tomorrow I am to attend the 90th birthday of a relative. By myself. Cause the rest of the house called "not it" before me, damn them. I love my aunt, and overall my family is cool.. but it's being held in a retirement village... so.. old people dust.  You know.. the dry, papery smell of rose or lavender.. the sandpaper and chalk sound of rustling ... stuff.  I shudder just thinking about it! The bad lipstick, aqua-net and scotch mint candies with the overall smell of Ben-Gay and mothballs, the rattling of cheap costume jewelery. Pretending to know who the hell is hugging me, and calling me by my sisters name. I have to be SOCIABLE!?! Talk about the weather, the game (?? baseball? football?.. the superworldseriesofhockymonton) pretend I know who Jennie is and that she had a baby.  And the worst of all... it will be me in far fewer years than I want to acknowledge! And my hemroids are acting up.

I think I'll start drinking now.....

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