Ups and Downs (subtitle, bowling isn't my thing)

Last night was the first time bowling since before the holidays. Two weeks closed, a prior engagement and the flu all kept me away from the bowling alley (or as i like to call it, the beerling alley) the return was triumphant!! Fantabulous!! Stupendous.... Ok, i'm lying. I sucked big weenies last night! And proceeded to pull a muscle and set off a RA flare. So today, i'm at work, huddled in a sweater, dosed with biofreeze and pain meds, trying to stay awake. Also trying to comfort Boy, who is having an awful week, and being buffeted by life on three sides. Have you ever wanted to pick up your kid (who is 6'2") and just spirit them away to paradise where nothing can hurt them? I can't.. But doesn't mean the urge is there. Fuck the "all part of life" crap. Someone hurt him, and i wanna take then down!! Going to try to make him come out this weekend, boys lunch. Show him that he's hurting, but never alone. .... Then i'll take names and kick butt... In my mind.

Two days in a row!

Canada may have lower cost medications.. but they are still damn expensive! Mama needs her Prozac! Just kidding... If i had Prozac . I wouldn't need this blog! I have Rheumatoid Disease. Basically my immune system is eating anywhere there is synovial fluid. Every joint, my lungs, heart, liver, brain.. you name it. The drugs to treat it are extremely expensive and have lovely side effects like explosive, involuntary diarrhea. And I have bronchitis. The Dr gave me inhalers, and an antibiotic that states it is for the treatment of Anthrax and Plague.  So to recap... involuntary diarrhea and a bad cough. The Pharma companies are douches!

I watched Pitch Perfect yesterday. Loved it.. but I realized that I'm like Fat Amy (spoiler alert... Fat Patricia!)  I put my faults out there so they can't be used against me. It's a HUGE defense mechanism.  Haven't decided if that is good... or a precursor to Prozac!

Cough.. diarrhea..Fat Amy... just another day in paradise!

Procrastinate much!?

OK, So it's been almost a year since I posted. Since no one reads my blog.. I know ya missed me! :-) What A year. I still can't seem to catch a break, but am trying. Two steps forward and five back at times. Trying to get my finances in order so I can start to plan my budgets instead of always reacting to my budgets. Trying to control my health so I can live and work and play without naps every hour, or pain. Trying to control my emotions so that I can live in harmony. Can't say I'm succeeding at any of it.. but trying! I am working full time again. which is a ying yang situation. On the plus side, I can't afford not to work so it's not an option not to.. On the negative side, at the end of the day, there is no energy left for me, or my family, or a social life.. if I had one.
My last date, I didn't know was a date. Went for a glass of wine with a friend. Truly a friend, have known him for 30 years. Apparently it was a seduction.  If I'd have known that, I would have showered, and shaved my legs, and put on deodorant. Scary! Sadly, that was well over a year ago.. I guess I have to go out and speak to people  in order to date. Not sure it's worth having to talk and be normal! I know! I need to invent a crazy recluse dating site! For, you know... crazy recluses!  We'd have social gatherings.. by webcam.. and make dates... online... and even meet.. at comicon!
Sometimes I think, I'm too old to date, I'm not beautiful, I'm not perfect. On the last date-that-I-didn"t-know-was-a-date, the guy asked me what I do to make guys cheat on me. That made me realize that maybe honesty, fidelity and actually TALKING are too old fashioned in the world of dating today.  Guys my age want 20 year olds, guys older than me... want 20 year olds.  At a stretch, they want 40 year olds who LOOK like 20 year olds.  All I want is someone who wants to be with me, isn't afraid to say it, and treats me like he actually cares. That seems to be too much to ask... I'll wait until this year's comicon!